Monday, April 03, 2006

Stress and pain

THe last two weeks have been hard and horrible. No, there is nothing wrong with the pregnancy, this has nothing to do at all with me being pregnant, except that the extra hormones have caused me to cry a lot more in the last two weeks than I have for a very long time.

Things with family, things with friends, things with work have all been really hard this week. God is amazing though, He prepared me and has been with me, even when I was foolish enough to forget it. Right now I just feel very empty and alone. Some days part of me wants to just pack up and go somewhere else, try again, start over - but I know that isn't what I really want or need to do. I love it here, and I know this is where I am to be, at least for now. Some days I wonder if I can really do this - whatever this happens to be at the time.

I hope all of the rotteness of the last two weeks is over. I hope I can relax and enjoy this week. I know that God will take care of everything, but sometimes in the waiting it's hard.


Julie said...

When was Joy's due date? IF already past what did she have?
Hope things are going well for you and I hope your pregnacy is going well. Enjoy that time!
Hope to hear from you soon! Miss you when you don't blog

Mommy Rader said...

I second are things going? I think about you all the time :) Hope you're beginning to feel better in your pregnancy....I can't believe you're almost 3 months! We're only a few weeks apart! It's so exciting to be pregnant with a friend at the same time :)