Tuesday, July 18, 2006

I love my belly!

While at work tonight two people asked me when I was due (both of whom were shocked to find out I was only 5 and a half months and only carying one baby)

That was the first time it's happened to me, and I love it. Complete strangers are aware of the miracle, the life that is forming inside me. It's so wonderful I can't even understand it.

I've always wanted to be a mother. I used to joke about wanting huge ammounts of kids. To have my little girl inside me, to feel her moving and kicking, to see my growing belly and knowing it means she is growing.

so wonderful

Sunday, July 16, 2006


I disapeared for a week.

Ok, not really, as much as I want to some times I still havn't really learned how to disappear.

I went back to NB for a week to visit my family and it was wonderful. I got to see almost everyone, which ment quite a bit of running around, but I aso got to sleep a lot, so it was ok.

In baby news, things are going well, but she seems to have put my back and hips out of alignment. In the words of my mother, i'm crooked.

I'll have pics up later, need to download them first

Wednesday, July 05, 2006

The deep deep love of God

The Bible is a love story. It's the typical love story really - boy creates girl, has mad passionate love for her, girl gets distracted and runs after others, this happens for centuries until the relationship is corrupted and broken, respebling nothing of what it was originally meant to be, so boy dies for girl so they can (eventually) live happily ever after.

The love of God amazes me. I just finished reading the book of Hosea (one of my favorites) and it captures this dynamic so well. As I was eading I started to cry as God spoke to me of His broken heart towards His people - the ones He has created and called and redeemed, but who still turn away. God hates divorce, but has permitted it as a last resort in cases of unfaithfulness. By His own word to Us He is free to abandon us to our pain and suffering and misery as we continue to seek after other things instead of Him. The more we reject Him and lavish our lives and our love on others the more He is justified in leaving us to the eternal consequences of our actions.

but He doesn't.

Stop reading. Go back up a few lines, think about that.

The deep love of God is to pursue us, to romance us, to awake a desire within us for Him that reflects but could never match the desire that He has for us. Even while we must face the consequences of our actions and our disobedience, He never leaves us but continually calles out for us to return to Him.

There is no lost cause in the eyes of God. Those people that we often write off as having gone too far,that feeling I'm sure most have experienced, wondering if they have crossed the line, if they can still be used by Him.

The love of God is greater far than tongue or pen can ever tell;
It goes beyond the highest star, and reaches to the lowest hell.
The guilty pair, bowed down with care. God gave his Son to win;
His erring child He reconciled, and pardoned from this sin.

O love of God how rich and pure! how measureless and strong!
It shall forever more endure. The saint's and angels song!

When years of time shall pass away, and earthly thrones and kingdoms fall,
When men who here refuse to pray, On rocks and hills and mountains call,
God's love so sure shall still endure, All measureless and strong;
Redeeming grace to Adam's race The saint's and angels song.

Could we with ink the ocean fill, And were the skies of parchment made,
Were every stalk on earth a quill, And every man a scribe by trade,
To write the love of God above Would drain the ocean dry;
Nor could the scroll contain the whole, Tho stretched from sky to sky.

O love of God how rich and pure! how measureless and strong!
It shall forever more endure. The saint's and angels song!