Thursday, December 21, 2006

Shameless Plugs

First off, Ben and I will be in NB from Dec. 23 to Jan 7, the first week we'll bein Saint John and the second in Woodstock - if you'll be around we'd love to see you! Leave a message here or email me and we'll work something out.

Second, Hana is being dedicated at River Valley Wesleyan Church on Sunday, Dec. 24. The service is at 10:45 am, and again, we'd love to see you if you can make it.

Third, two posts ago I gave a theory, and asked for opinions...and nothing...what's with that? I'd like some feedback, maybe hear some other theories...I know people read this...ok, maybe asking for comments isn't following blog ettewuitte, but still...

Sunday, December 17, 2006

6 weeks is up

my house is clean. Praise God

My theory on everything

Ok, well, maybe not everything....but this is my way of understanding the whole God knows what will happen and we still have free will issue. I came up with this mostly as a teen and trying to understand things that were going on. At Bethany I kind of kept it to myself, but what I learned didn't make it seem completely hiretical, so I've kept it tucked away. It's probably not so much of a theory as an attemt to understand things far beyond my comprehension.

As we go through life, making decisions, it's as if we're walking down a road. In front of us we can see cross streets and twists and upcoming turns, all representing various experiences, opportunities and choices we will face. The decisions we make determine which road we go down, and, while we can see a certain distance ahead, the road is not stright and our ability to see where our choices will lead us is limited.

In turn, God has the map. He sees all the streets, all the possibilits, all the different ways to make it to the same destination. He has a route marked out for us, one that will be most beneficial (tho not necisarily (or likely) the easiest - hardships teach us to persevere, and we need all that comes with that). He also sees the other roads, the ones He wants to steer us away from, and how they always seem to intersect at crutial points with His plan.

God can see all the outcomes of all our possible decisions, and how they intersect with all the outcomes of everyone elses decisions. His plan is worked through leading us in a way to get us "in the right place at the right time" so to speak - leading us down one road so that we have an opportunity to intersect with another road that we may have missed earlier.

I see this lived out in people's lives. I've also experienced it myself. At a crutial point I'll make a decison that leads me away from God's plan for me (and will in some way usually be aware of this) - I deal with the consequences, I repent, and then later, as a result of different experinces and decisions, I'll be faced with the same opportunity once again. Just like making a wrong turn and then looping back around, cathing the street at a different block.

Again, not sure how accurate this is, but it works for me, and I was wondering if anyone had any insight on this? Let me know...

Monday, December 11, 2006

In General

Things are going great! We took Hana to Ben's work Christmas Party on Saturday and she had a blast! I had her dancing with me and she loved it, and we never heard a peep out of her the whole evening...and then she slept through the night! It was absolutely wonderful!

We're so excited to be back in NB for Christmas! Still need to get christmas shopping finished, but there's not much left, so it shouldn't take too long.

I've found a new obsession - Babywearing! I've found so many more ways to use my CuddlyWrap and it's easier on her and me (she was starting to not like her head squished the way I was doing it before, so I looked for other ways to wrap her). I even experimented putting her on my back, and with Ben's help it was easy, with a little ore practice, and as she gets bigger, I'll be able to do it myself. I also bought another wrap, one that's not streachy, so it'll be easier to keep tight as she gets heavier. There's so many different kinds of carriers and so many ways to carry, and with all of them Hana is close to me like she wants to be, and yet I still have my hands free to do what I need to get done. When I'm not wearing her she's hapy to be in her swing or her crib, because she's getting all the cuddle time she needs. Happy baby and happy mom!

Thursday, December 07, 2006

Unreal

I've got Hana in her wrap right now. She's been having a rough day....or I've been having a rough day rather. She's been having a needy day. She doesn't want to sleep in her crib, she's generally fussy, and she's been eating more often than usual - basically just growing and needing extra comfort, so no big deal really.

I think of how much she needs. Without someone helping her, she couldn't survive. Today she can't even sleep comfortably without help from someone else. She needs to be changed, fed, held, everything.

It's hard to picture Jesus in this position. I can imagine Mary being confused and maybe even frustrated as Jesus would cry non-stop for seemingly no reason. I wonder if she ever felt guilty for wanting just a few minutes of peace, and then realizing that the child she was so frustrated at was the one who would bring peace to the earth.

Wednesday, December 06, 2006

Intellectual Dishonesty

Since I started going online regularly as a teen I've been part of various message board communities. I really enjoy message boards because it's a great way to communicate, share ideas and learn.

Unfortunately, some people aren't as open to sharing ideas and learning as others, and this tends to frustrate me. In the spirit of being "nice" and "accepting" people can sometimes tend to go soft, and want everyone around them to be soft as well. Instead of sharing opinions, they would rather just skirt issues and pretend that everything is right for everyone. They call this being open minded. I call it intelectual dishonesty.

Let's be truthful here, if someone feels strongly that their oppinion about something is right, then they (by default) feel just as strongly that a differing oppinion is wrong. They may be able to fit it into a "right for you, wrong for me" sort of category, but even still, not every issue will fit like that.

I honestly believe it's possible for two (or more) people to have a conversation about something, disagree completely, share their reasons why, and all go away happy and having learned something - either expanding their point of view, having a greater understanding for other points of view, or realizing that they didn't know as much about the subject as they thought (or possibly all of the above).

There are a few dear people in my life that I am usually in disagreement with about certain issues, and I treasure the conversations that we have. They thibnk I'm wrong, I think they're wrong, but we undersand that it's possible neither of us really know what we're talking about, so it's ok. In these conversations I've learned humility, I've learned how to express myself, and I've learned that I can be wrong, very very wrong. I've learned that having to defend my ideas strengthens my belief in them, and that the best way to help someone to understand my position is to do all I can to understand theirs.

So back to the intelectual dishonesty - it frustrates me when I'm accused of "trampling" another person because I refuse to just say "oh, that's nice" when something I believe strongly in is being discussed. I share my point of view, expecting (hoping?) and appriciating when the other person expresses theirs. We may not agree, but we can both go away having learned something.

My stance in a discussion is this - if you've already made up your mind, then my oppinion shouldn't threaten you, so why not listen and perhaps learn something. If you have not made up your mind, then shouldn't you want as much information from as many sides of the issue as possible?

I try not to be arrogant, I'm always open to the possibility that I am the one who is wrong, but expect me to give and defend my position until you show me where (and how) I am wrong.

Sigh.

Maybe I should take a break from message boards for a while....or find people I truly can discuss (and possibly disagree) with.

Sunday, December 03, 2006

already a month old...



Wow a month goes fast. I can't believe that she's a month old already, she's still so small. She has grown a lot tho - the preemie clothes we had to buy for her are getting on the smaller side, but still fit. Her regular clothes mostly fit now too (the pants don't go up to her armpits anymore).

She's so much more awake and aware now, and she's starting to coo and smile. She's the most precious little baby, I'm daily amazed by how much I love her. I didn't think it would be possible to love another being this much.

I'm doing well too, I have no pain at all from my incision, but I'm still not considered healed for another two weeks. It's a little frustrating because it limits what I can lift and my cleaning. Most frustrating is that the stroller is out of my lifting ability, so even in nice days Hana and I usually stay in if I don't have the car.

I love being a mom, this is thebest feeling in the world.

Ps - lots of pictures in her album - hanapics.cjb.net