Monday, June 16, 2008

To my Unborn Child

First of all, know that you are loved. You were loved since the moment of your conception, and before that, we loved the idea of you. We planned for you, hoped for you, prayed for you, and were thrilled to hear of your pending arrival. All day long I feel you moving, I usually have a hand over you, anxiously awaiting when I can hold you with my arms instead of my womb. Your father falls asleep nightly with his arms around us both, keeping us safe and secure. Your sister cuddles and kisses you every chance she gets. If nothing else in life, know that you are loved and wanted.

I know that through this pregnancy I have complained about the aches and pains, the pokes and prods, and the fact that you stand on my bladder (Which I had suspected and had proven on ultrasound). Never have any of those complaints been a sign of regret or unhappiness on my part. You'll learn through your life that sometimes I whine, but only in an attempt to share my experiences with those that I love. Feeling you move inside me brings me so much joy and excitement. I love watching my belly dance, love seeing how full of life you are. I can't wait to meet you.

I'm so anxious for that moment when I'll wrap you in my arms, close to my heart where you belong. You'll hear my heartbeat just as you have for your whole existence, and I will feel your movements just as I have these past few months. We'll look one another in the eye for the first time, but it won't be a meeting of strangers. We have always known each other.

I see your sister as the ocean - a powerful, determined force full of beauty and assurance. You I picture as a tree - strong, comforting, firm and beautiful. These are things I pray for you. I pray for you to be strong, to have a strength that comes from within, from your knowledge of who you are, of right and wrong and how the world works. I pray for you to be a comfort to those around you, to share their load without being overcome with it. I pray you will be firm in what you believe and in what you know, that the paths you take will inspire a passion in you that you could never dream of forsaking. I pray you will be beautiful in who you are, in how you treat others and in how you live your life. That you will see the beauty in all that is around you, never taking it for granted.

My precious child, through your life things will not always be perfect, they may not even always be good. There will be times when you'll be broken, or feel alone or afraid. There are times that I will be the cause of that, and I want to apologize in advance. No matter what happens, we'll find a way through it. We are never alone in this life, and there are times when it is not our responsibility to act, but to believe.

I so deeply want to instill in you a sense of spirituality, a desire to connect with the Divine, to seek Him out with all of your heart and soul and find your ultimate rest with Him. When I can not carry you, He will. When I can not comfort you, when I can not share your joys and sorrows He will be ever with you.

With all my love
mama

2 comments:

glo said...

beautiful steph.

Dena said...

definitely beautiful, such love.