I have (not) arrived

I'm working full time at a job and part time with a church. My husband has a full time job and is co-director of children's ministries at the same church. Once we get a house, it would be safe to say we've settled, that we've arrived, that we're doing what we will be for the rest of our lives.

But that's not it.

This isn't what we want to be doing for the rest of our lives. I love my job at the store, but I will only be there as long as necessary. I want to be full time at the Summit, but that just can't happen right now.

And I see the faces of people as they dig in to what God has said and I see the changes in them as God grabs hold of their hearts and it makes me praise and all of me desires to do that all the time.

But I can't.

And Ben loves his job too. It's a little frustrating at times because of the schedule, but he likes it, and once he's been there a little longer the pay will be great. But it's not where he's supposed to be either. When we can, he's going to go back to school, and when God says we're ready, we're going to go to Japan.

It's hard to be in the in between. To do what we need to do just so we can get to the next step. Or maybe it's just hard for me because I lack patience.