Water

I've talked here before about Hana being spirited That discovery made a huge change in our relationship, and in our whole family dynamic. Understanding her personality, her sensitivities and her needs has cut power struggles out of the equation. I'm able to empower her, and to teach her tools she needs to cope with the intensity of her emotions, especially disappointment.

I've also learned the power that water has over my child. I know many people (myself included) who feel a sense of calm and peace when sitting by the water, or who find a hot shower or relaxing bath to be the perfect cure for all their troubles. Hana is the same way.

IF she's having a cranky day, water is the cure. Sitting her in her high chair with a few tablespoons of water on her tray for her to splash in is a powerful cure for a bad day. A shower or bath is like hitting her reset button and getting a second chance at the day. If she's in the middle of a fit and just can not calm down, putting her fingers or toes in cool running water brings her back to her senses.

It's an amazing thing how quickly and easily it calms her. Sure, she (and the floor) get a bit wet every now and then, but honestly that's much easier to deal with than a screaming toddler. It's also something that she'll be able to use herself as she gets older, a tool to help her deal with life.

Simply Living

While living in Calgary I came to the conclusion that Ben and I had far too much stuff - especially for people who had only been married about a year. Our apartment was full, our storage was full, and there always seemed to be something on the floor to trip over.

The odd thing about having all that stuff was that the vast majority of it was not being used. That's not to say it was useless, it just wasn't serving any purpose in our lives.

So I did what any rational person would do - packed it away and ignored it until we moved and I had to do something about it.

Since then we've taken on a philosophy of simple living - trying very hard not to have excess, to reuse as much as possible, to buy second hand when available, and to purge as needed.

It basically goes like this - if I see something I *think* we need, we wait a month or so to see if we can still happily live without it, or if it really would make our lives better. This is a great way to avoid spending money on gadgets.

Secondly, if I notice something in our home is just taking up space, I box it up and put it in storage. If it stays in storage for a year without being missed and doesn't have any future use (such as books and toys for Hana when she's older), then it's already conveniently boxed up and ready to go to Goodwill etc.

Thirdly, we get accountability with our "problem areas" - for me it's yarn and books, and for Ben it's electronics and games. There are very strict rules about those things coming into the house, usually involving a bit of "one in, two out" philosophy. It's hard - especially for books because in my family it was basically a crime to get rid of a book - but it does keep things under control a bit.

I admit we're not perfect at this yet, but we're learning. Even right now I'm looking at our tower of rarely watched DVDs and wondering if it's time to clean house a bit. Anyone else have any tips on how to avoid excess in life and keep it simple?

Independance

Right now Hana is sitting in her high chair feeding herself yogurt. With a spoon.

I'm amazed. It's hard to believe that two years ago I was just starting to wear maternity clothes. That in such a short period of time not only have I become a parent, but that my child - that tiny being that started out too small to even see - is a person. A whole person, full of ideas, desires, emotions.

She's so independent now. She won't let us carry her up or down the stairs, or anywhere else for that matter. She always wants to "go walk". And she does go, she's fearless, once she gets the ok that she can explore she takes off and finds out everything she can about her environment.

She has wants and makes them clear. When they're not filled, she gets upset and expresses that, and then moves on to something else. When she wants help she asks for it. When she's excited about something she shares it with us.

I'm so amazed at how much she's grown and how quickly she learns. She's not a baby anymore, no longer fully dependent on me. But she's still mine, still needs her mama when she can't get back to sleep in the middle of the night, or when she feels like a snuggle in the middle of the day. As she grows our bond is changing, but it's still there, and still makes my heart sing.

Poked and Proded

Hana and I each had Dr appointments today.

She did great, she got 3 vaccinations, was weighed, measured and checked over. She did great with the vaxes, even cried less than I would have! She is now a whopping 21lbs3oz! Yeah, not so whopping. She's tiny - healthy and active, but tiny.

My appointment went well too. Baby is head down! That's just one more thing that makes this pregnancy so different from Hana's - she was breach the entire time. Everything looks great and I go back in two weeks. The only real concern now is getting my records from Alberta sent. We've been trying to get them since February and so far we have nothing. Not so good - they need my surgery notes.

So it was a big morning and we slept a good chunk of the afternoon. Hopefully the grogginess from the vaxes comes back and Hana won't be up all night!

Anti-bacterial products make me sick

Ben and I were away this weekend, which means we had TV. We don't have cable at our house, and aside from the news and Ben's games, our tv is never on. So when I do get to watch TV, the thing that sticks out to me the most is the adds.

I noticed a theme. Anti-bacterial products. From those Lysol wipes to a product that cleans the germs out of the s-curve in your toilet (so your waste doesn't get sick?) to a germ-killing pest control product (that's right! Those harmless (yet annoying) insects are carrying germs!!!!).

I have to say, these products make me a little nervous. Personally, I have no anti-bacterial products. Nope, not even a little bottle of hand sanitizer for the diaper bag.

When I need to wash, I use soap and water. If I'm being paranoid about potentially harmful things (like raw meat - eeeww!!!!) I use vinegar. If it's just general nastyness and not something that would make my family sick, I use dish soap (we trust it to get the icks off dishes (including raw meat) so why not other icks?)

The problem I have with all this anti-bacterial crazyness is that the bacteria we're trying to hard to kill has been around at least as long as we have. We've learned to co-exist. Sure, there are occasions where something gets out of hand, but for the most part so long as we're not being stupid (like eating raw chicken) they don't really pose a threat.

There is a need for exposure to germs - it gives the immune system a little kick and makes sure everything is working well, so that if we're exposed in large doses we're less likely to get sick. That's the basic premise behind vaccinations - a little exposure now to guard against a lot of exposure later.

Aside from that, there are good bacteria. There's also a craze right now for pro-biotics. They're in everything lately it seems. Thats because all these measures we're taking against getting sick end up killing the good bacteria that keep us from getting sick.

There really is no need to be so worried about germs. Aside from special circumstances (like hospitals) all this extra stuff can actually be harmful - and at the very least causes paranoia! Don't believe the marketing - there is no need for this stuff!

To sleep, perchance to dream

If good writers write what they know, then I should be the last person on earth writing about sleep.

Since high school I've gone through phases of insomnia - weeks at a time where I just don't sleep. It's not that I'm not tired, or that I don't try to sleep, it just doesn't work. I've learned to deal with it and when it happens I sleep when I can, but it isn't easy.

Even when insomnia isn't an issue I have a hard time sleeping. My nights are filled with tossing and turning. I'm blessed to have a husband who sleeps like the dead (or rather, he's blessed with that ability), otherwise there would definitely be issues with our relationship. A good night for me means I don't actually get out of bed. A typical night means it takes about an hour to fall asleep, I wake up and change position about 4 times (taking about 15 minutes to get back to sleep each time), and I'm out of bed once (either a potty break or just getting up until I feel tired again).

So it is no real surprise to me that Hana has "sleep issues". Even now at 18 months it's rare for her to go from midnight to 7 without at least one wake up (tho she usually puts herself back to sleep), never mind going a whole 12 hours without me going in at least once.

Now, being pregnant, I have to get out of bed at least once a night and trying to get comfortable seems like an impossible task. Hana is cutting her eye teeth (two through, two to go!) and so has been needing me at least once a night, sometimes twice. She's also started a lovely habit of being wide awake for two or more hours in the early morning.

So we're tired here. Very very tired. This weekend I'm really hoping to get two nights of uninterruptedish sleep and hopefully that will make the next few weeks easier.

I guess the good news is that waking up with a newborn won't really throw me off my routine too much and shouldn't be that hard to deal with.

Wet Wet Wet

Last Sunday night, or early Monday morning rather, I awoke to a familiar sound. Hana was whimpering and moving around in her bed. She wasn't crying, and I could tell she was trying to put herself back to sleep, so I tried to do the same.

Then I noticed there was something different from other nights I had woken to her whimpering. IN the midst of the noises, she was saying "wet".

Now let me tell you something about Hana that she will probably wish I didn't share once she's older - this girl pees like a fountain. We've had to put her in disposable diapers at night because she pees so much it was waking her up. We cut back on liquids, and she was able to stay drier through the day, but at night she'd still be soaked.

So I was preparing myself for a wet child, but sort of figured she was just practicing her new word in her sleep. I went in to check, and she was on her belly, bum in the air, trying to sleep. I rubbed her back and her bum and both we dry. Excellent.

Before I went back to bed I checked to see if she had her soother, she didn't, so I thought I'd pat around the bed looking for it.

My hand went into a puddle. I checked around some more. The whole front of Hana's pj's, the bed and her blankets were all soaked. And she was trying very hard to get back to sleep.

In fact she wanted so much to be asleep that she got quite upset with me for trying to change her. Have you ever tried to get a sleeper off a child while they're curled on their belly in the fetal position? Getting the new diaper on was also a bit of a struggle. Apparently she didn't want me to do anything about the "wet", she just wanted to let me know what was going on.

Needless to say, she spent the rest of the night in bed with us, and I will never again underestimate the power of a child's bladder.

Breastfeeding Is Smart

A recent study has been over the news lately stating that breastfeeding leads to a higher IQ.

We all know "breast is best" for both mama and baby, and the more we get this information out, the better.

Still, I have a problem with how this study is being publicized.

Keep in mind that Hana has been formula fed since the day after she was born, and exclusively on formula since 19 days old. I was also formula fed, as were the vast majority of the people in my family. And we're pretty smart people (In high school I tested 136 on an IQ test, but that was before mommy hood stole my brain). This is not intended to make anyone feel guilty, or whatever. We make our choices and we live with them, and we all survive.

The problem I have is that the wording makes it seem as though formula feeding is the norm, the standard. As in, normally baby x would have an IQ of ***, but if breastfed, it would be higher. That's wrong. Human babies are designed to have human milk. All the potential within that child will be released as different conditions are met - food, shelter, love, education, whatever. It's not that breastfeeding raises that potential, it's that formula feeding lacks something that would release it. Breast milk doesn't raise IQ, formula lowers it.

Again, not saying formula fed children are not smart, they're just not as smart as they could be were they breastfed. Like an athlete - if they aren't given the proper training and instruction, they can't preform at the level they would if they did have those things.

I find it astounding that as a culture we have effectively stunted ourselves - but there is no sense guessing at what could have been. Unfortunately, as long as formula is seen as the norm (or at least the norm after x amount of months) we will never see the full potential of our children. To continue talking about breastfeeding as tho it is super human, special, or above the norm only reinforces that it isn't the norm. Mothers have enough stress and worry and choices with their children, so if their kids can be "normal" without the pain, hassle and stress of breastfeeding (because honestly that's what it often is portrayed as, and can feel like at first), then why put themselves through it? Breastfeeding really should be normalized, not specialized.

Wedded Bliss

Ben and I have been married 3 years today.

In that time we have experienced two cross country moves, found our first apartment and our first house, and have owned two cars. We have changed jobs ten times. We've gone through a crisis, an emotional breakdown, and a big change of plans. We've had one child and are working on our second. He has learned to say know and I've learned to listen. He's learned to raise his voice and I've learned to lower mine. We've learned how to communicate, how to play, how to laugh and how to live in small spaces together.

Ben is the most wonderful husband I could ever have dreamed of. He's strong, caring, understanding and always respectful. He loves me with his whole self in a way that I never knew I could be loved. He's an amazing father, a reliable provider, and let me pick the paint colours for the house. I love him will all I am and look forward to the rest of our lives together.

18 Months

My baby is 18 months old. And she finally (almost) fits into 18 month clothing. I've packed away all of her 9 month pants and most of her 6 and 9 month shirts. Yeah, she's pretty little. I'm guessing around 23lbs, but we have an appointment this month, so I'll find out for sure.

Her vocabulary impresses me, altho anyone who knows me isn't surprised - she comes by her talkative nature honestly. She is also so curious and loves exploring and trying new things. She is always on the go. No matter what we're doing, after a few minutes she'll look at me full of excitement and say "go?" before heading off to explore.

In the last month she has encountered play dough, mud, grass, slides, swings and rain. She's loved every minute of it. We we outside one day and it started raining - the icky cold kind of rain. I said it was time to go in, she looked at me as if I was crazy. So I laughed and said she was a little duck. Her response: "quack quack"

The most wonderful thing she's learned in the last month is how to sleep. We've even had a few nights where I haven't had to get up with her at all. There are times it takes more effort than I like to admit to get her to go to sleep, but the 3-5 wakings seem to be slowing down.

Hana is the most animated, expressive, caring child I've encountered. She lights up my day and fills it with laughter. She teaches me a different way to look at the world, shows me new things to get excited about, and reminds me how wonderful it is to just sit and snuggle with someone you love. We learn more from her every day, and couldn't be more blessed as parents.

Nursing Pictures

Finally Blogger has allowed me to upload pictures. I asked on TBW, the message board I frequent, if anyone had some discreet nursing pics without covers. The wonderful mamas there were happy to share. I honestly think that the only reason people feel uncomfortable with nursing is because they are not exposed to it often enough, so here's some (discreet) exposure for you.

My thoughts on Nursing In Public

Thanks everyone for the input, I really appreciate it, especially the different cultural perspective.

The reason I asked is because I plan on nursing this baby like the Canadian Government says to - anytime, anywhere. I also remember from Hana's newborn days that not every newborn baby will tolerate something being over their head. For her that just was not an option. I do plan on nursing in carriers however, which can be completely discreet. Look at this picture: (Ok, I have a couple great pictures I've been told I can use here, but I can't get them uploaded right now, so you'll have to come back to see my point)

I have to say I disagree with the sort of black/white mentality - that without a cover of some sort, the woman is exposing her breast and that's wrong. I've seen plenty of women nurse without covers without exposing their breast, and I actually find it much less distracting or obvious than when they have a big pink blanket thrown over their shoulder. I do agree that having more chest exposed than would be seen while wearing an appropriate top isn't a good idea, but the act of nursing itself is not obscene or offensive, and if someone thinks that it is, they are free to remove themselves from the situation.

I also am not sure if I agree with the "if it bothers someone, don't do it" idea, even in a worship setting. Are we saying that people who can't sing on key shouldn't sing, or that children shouldn't be present unless they are silent and don't move? There are lots of things that happen during any public gathering that can distract someone, but we learn to live with (and ignore) those distractions.

As another note, were I informed by someone that my nursing was bothering them, I would be offended that they were paying so much attention to my chest. So then who is in the wrong - the person using her breasts as God Himself designed, or the person looking at the breasts of someone who is not his wife?

I think the North American view of breasts (and women in general, but that's another post...) is very skewed and over sexualized. Yes, that's the way things are and we have to accept that, to a point. However, things will never change if we keep breastfeeding in a closet. If a woman feels comfortable nursing her child wherever she is, then she should be free to make that choice, and no one else has the right to take that away from her.

Nursing In Church

I'm aware that nursing in public can cause quite a fuss, regardless that it is perfectly legal and in some places is actually protected by law.

There is no question that breast milk is the best source of nutrition for an infant. There is also no question that a mother has the right to feed her hungry child (I've never seen a bottle feeding mother asked to leave anywhere). However, people get really uncomfortable when the breast milk is coming straight from the tap.

Some say it's ok so long as the mother is "discreet". The problem is, there is no real definition of discreet. Does that mean the mother must use a blanket? Go to the corner with her back to the room? Feed in a bathroom (ick!)? Honestly tho, which is more obvious - cradling a child and carrying on with life, or sitting with a big tent draped over you?

So consider this a bit of a poll - is nursing in church (as in during the service) inappropriate? What conditions (blanket, womens service, age of the child etc.) make it appropriate or inappropriate?

I'd also really appreciate opinions of men on this, especially those who are on the platform, so ladies, ask your husbands.

Pregnancy Update

I am now 27wks pregnant. Yeah, I know, where did the time go! This pregnancy is honestly flying by, but I guess that's what chasing after a toddler every day will do!

Things are very different this time around. With Hana I had an anterior placenta (at the front of my belly) so movement was sort of muted until about 30 weeks. This time around I've been getting good strong see-my-belly-move sort of kicks since about 23 wks. Baby is very active! There is also less fear and worry this time around, which has made it a much more comfortable and magical pregnancy. Feeling my baby move, seeing myself grow, it just leaves me in awe, especially as I'm watching Hana grow and learn. It's so unreal to think that I have a part in bringing a life into the world!

I go for my glucose tolerance screening test on Wednesday and I'm expecting to pass no problem. Really it's just another useless blood draw, but oh well. I'm also going to get them to check my iron - I was really anemic with Hana and have been feeling slugish again lately, and I'm getting poked anyway. I'll also have my monthly appointment to be measured. So far everything is right on track!

I'm huge again this time. Random people keep asking when I'm due, thinking it's sometime in May. Nope. Not til July. It's kind of amusing watching their reactions. This is what happens when you have a really short torso and grow a baby. I don't mind, I like my belly, even tho I can't see my feet.

Pictures to come when Blogger lets me. Or you can just check my facebook.

Why Every New Parent Needs A Carrier

- All babies (that I know of) go through a stage where they just want to be held *all* the time. For some babies it doesn't last long, and sometimes you can "break" the baby of that habit, but it's still something that happens. Then you have 3 choices - listen to baby scream, hold baby and get nothing done, or get a carrier.

- It's good for the baby. Babies are biologically wired to be in close contact with their mothers. It helps regulate breathing, digestion, sleep and other cycles.

- It promotes breastfeeding. Babies who are worn in carriers root and nurse more, and their smell helps stimulate milk production in the mother.

- You don't have to worry about strangers touching your baby when you're out. Strangers can't get to the hands or faces of newborns when they're all snuggled up with their mama or daddy.

- It gives mama some freedom. When Hana was a newborn I could shop, go for walks, clean, take the train etc. without having to worry about a car seat or big heavy stroller. We lived in a basement apartments and after my c/s it was enough effort just getting myself up the stairs, let alone the stroller! I would have been stuck in the house while Ben was at work, but instead I had complete freedom.

- It gives Daddy a chance to bond with baby. Newborns sleep a lot, and usually when they're awake it's to be fed or changed. For a baby who is nursing, it can be hard for Daddy to get quality time in. Wearing a baby in a carrier during naps gets baby used to daddy's smell, voice, movements etc. and also gives Mama a chance to shower or sleep while Daddy gets bonding time.

- It can calm a fussy baby. The security, movement, breathing and heartbeat will remind baby of the womb and help soothe it. It makes the transition from womb to world easier on them.

Beautiful Sight

This is a picture of Hana sleeping in her bed for a nap. I know I've talked a bit about our sleep troubles on here, but honestly, unless you've had a child who doesn't sleep, you have no idea how absolutely amazing this is.

First of all, Hana had only slept in her crib a handful of times for naps since she was about a month old. Even when she was staying most of the night in her crib she would not go there for naps. She either needed to be in a carrier or in my bed. Starting last Monday, she has had every nap in her bed without issue.

Secondly, she's been staying all night in her bed. All. Night. No falling asleep in our bed and then being transfered to hers. No waking at 3 am and absolutely refusing to do anything but stand there with her arms up, sobbing until we bring her into our bed.

We've had people tell us to just let her firgure it out. Or to "be strong" and just not pick her up. But after over two hours of constant crying to the point of gagging (and that's with me in the room to comfort her!) and the knowledge that my daughter feels emotions so intensly that when she gets worked up like that she just does not have the ability to calm herself down, bringing her to bed was the wise option.

For a few months when she was younger, she put herself to sleep at night, woke around 3 for her soother, at 5 to bed fed, came in bed with me at 7 and was up for the day before 9. Not a bad routine at all for a 4 month old! After while she cut out the feeding and would wake at 11 and 4, come in bed at 7 and sleep another hour or so with me. Again, nothing to complain about, since really I was only getting up once in the night (at 4).

When we moved it all went to pieces. She would consistently wake 4 times a night (11, 2, 4, and 6), sometimes more, sometimes only 3 times. Then she was sick with a mold infecton that lasted a couple of months. Then we moved again and she refused to be in her room alone, never mind in her crib. Then after Christmas we managed to get her to sleep in our room, transfer her to hers and she'd stay there til about 5 (waking at 11 and 3). That lasted about two weeks and then her molars started coming in and I lost count of the number of times she would wake.

Since February she's been falling asleep in her bed and then coming in with us around 3, then waking once or twice until we got up around 8. It wasn't perfect, but it was a system that worked - we all we getting a decent amount of sleep, and she was usually only awake for a few minutes. Some nights we just didn't bother transferring her to her bed because she was so restless it wouldn't have been worth the effort.

Mid March that system wasn't working so well for us anymore. I have trouble sleeping when pregnant as it is because I usually sleep on my belly or my back. Sleeping on my side makes my hips and back hurt, so I shift positions a lot at night. So I would shift and wake Hana up, she would shift and wake Ben up. It would take her 20 minutes or so to settle, and if either of us moved during that time it would take even longer. Something had to change.

We had been debating taking the rail off of Hana's crib since Christmas, but weren't sure if it would make things worse. Last Tuesday I decided just to do it.

Best. Decision. Ever.

It started with her nap. Within 20 minutes of putting her on the bed, she was asleep. In her bed. Alone. She slept for two hours and then waited until I came in to get out of bed. That night it took over an hour to get her to sleep (which happens about twice a week recently), but she slept. She woke twice, but never once asked to go into our bed. I slept all night next to my husband without Hana kicking me or trying to push me off the bed. It was a beautiful thing.

Since then we haven't looked back. She still needs help once a night to get her soother off the floor or put her blankets back over her, but I usually get up once or twice a night to go to the bathroom anyway, so that isn't a problem at all. I feel better than I have in months - a good night of sleep makes such a HUGE difference in how I see the world. My house is cleaner, my days are more active, and our family time has much better quality. She's getting me up a bit earlier than before (usually between 6:30 and 7), but even tho I'm not a morning person, after a good night of sleep that isn't a problem at all!

17 Months

I realize I'm a whole day early on this one. It's to make up for all the times I've been a day or two late.

Since learning how to walk, Hana has taken off. I think her brain was just so focussed on that one thing that now the whole world has opened up to her. She's toddling along everywhere - arms out in front of her, still a little stiff. It's a cute little zombie walk. She tries to run, but hasn't quite got the mechanics of that down yet.

She's learning so quickly. Yesterday while trying to steal a few extra minutes in bed I taught her what a chin is. It throughly impressed Ben when he came home, but didn't give me enough time to stay under the covers. I'll try for a harder lesson next time.

This month we're trying something new - Hana sleeping in her own bed. Since moving from Alberta she's spent at least part of every night in with us. There was a lot going on in her little world, she needed the extra comfort and we were happy to give it. Unfortunately, there's just enough room for Ben in bed along with me and my belly and my pillows, so lately no one has been getting a very good sleep. We took the side off Hana's crib yesterday and she slept there all night. It was blissful. Hopefully this will be the new trend.

Every day I get to see more of her personality - her passion, her emotions, her joy and curiosity. I'm so proud of my daughter, amazed by her. The person she is is so much more than I could have ever imagined. I hope that Ben and I are able to nurture, teach and encourage her to grow and mature in those things. To be sensitive, to be passionate, to be strong and to not give up. Those things might be a challenge now, while she's so young and doesn't understand all of her big emotions, but they'll shape her into a wonderful woman as she grows, and I can't wait to see that.

Questions

I've realized that had I not studied religion I would have really enjoyed anthropology. I've also had an intense curiosity for different cultures, different beliefs, how they evolve and shape how we see the world. It's amazing to me how much of an influence culture, tradition and belief have over perceptions.

An example of this from my own life - for the longest time I thought for sure that the vast majority of Americans must spend a fortune on getting their rugs cleaned or replaced because they worse their shoes in the house all the time. The reason for this odd belief - you rarely see someone in socks or bare feet on TV. Growing up were NEVER allowed to wear our shoes in the house, it would make too much of a mess. Putting those two things together I thought Americains must be pretty foolish. (I've since learned that wasn't the case, so no need to correct me on my thoughts there).

Have you ever just sat down and wondered why we do the things we do? Where traditions come from, why they hold their power? I find a lot of times that tradition taken on it's own - with no explanation, no context, no history behind it - looses it's purpose, and can be seen as something it is not. An example of this is the head coverings worn by Muslim women. In the Western world we often see this as some sort of oppression of femininity, repression of personal freedom or some form of control placed over the women. In fact, it's a sacred choice, a covenant between the woman and her God, a way for her to show the world that she is not to be seen as a sexual object, it allows her to show her intelligence, her creativity, her personality.

I remember hearing a story once - a little girl was watching her mother cook supper. They were having roast beef, and the mother carefully cut the end off of the roast. The little girl asked why she did that, and the mother couldn't answer - maybe it made it taste better, or got rid of some fat, or made it more tender, she wasn't sure, but it had to have some importance. So the mother called up the little girls grandmother to ask. The grandmother chuckled and said she wasn't sure either, it's just the way her mother had always done it, so that's what she did. The mother decided to pay a visit to her grandmother to see how far back the tradition went. She was surprised at the answer - "I don't know why the rest of you do it, but my pan was always too small."

This is why I question everything. Perceptions, traditions, stereotypes, assumptions. A lot of these things are good, helpful, insightful. A lot of them are not - they have either become obsolete and unnecessary, or are in desperate need of an update, or are just plain wrong.

Strong Words

I found this artist when a friend of mine posted a video on facebook.

Since then, I've been listening to her constantly. She is strong, powerful, passionate, real. I love it. This is one of my favorites

An Amazing Thing

This article was posted on a forum I frequent.

Yeah, I know, most of you won't read it. What if I tell you it's about a pregnant man, would that get your attention?

He is transgendered. He has some gender reassignment surgery, but kept his reproductive organs. His wife lost her uterus to endomitriosis. Using donor sperm, they were able to inseminate the husbands uterus and are going to have a baby girl.

There has been a lot of controversy about this, including doctors refusing to treat them. I think that's a horrible thing.

I can understand people not understanding it, even needing a bit of time to process the whole reality of the situation (men don't usually have a uterus). However I don't understand why people think it's such a horrible thing that a loving, happily married couple want to bring a child into the world so they can love and care for it.

There are much better things to get upset about than that.